Movie Review – G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra

G.I. Joe: The Rise of Cobra

Directed by Stephen Sommers

Starring Channing Tatum, Marlon Wayans, Rachel Nichols, Ray Park, Sienne Miller, Joseph Gordon-Levitt, Christopher Eccleston, Lee Byung-hun, and Dennis Quaid.


Everything old truly is new again, as all my childhood toys become fodder for Hollywood. When Transformers was such a huge hit two years ago, we all knew it was just a matter of time before GI Joe came to the big screen. But in what iteration? GI Joe has been around since the 1960s. Would it be the original? The classic GI Joe vs Cobra from my youth, or some new iteration? All I knew was, the early photos of Snake Eyes has his costume looking right, so I was getting pumped.


In the not-too-distant future, weapons manufacturer James McCullen has perfected a new form of nanotechnology called nanomites. These microscopic robots have fantastic weapons potential, as they can eat metal. The first prototype nanomite warheads are being transported by an American military unit, whose two top officers go by the nicknames Duke and Ripcord. While in the convoy, Duke and Ripcord are ambushed by some form of military unit with advanced weaponry, the type of which they’ve never seen, and they’re bailed out by a unit with equally advanced weaponry. Turns out they were rescued by GI Joe, a highly trained, daring special missions force. Duke and Ripcord quickly joining GI Joe to find out who stole the warheads, why they want them, and James McCullen might be involved. Also working for James McCullen is the femme fatale Ana, who was once Duke’s fiance, and is now known as the Baroness. What caused her to switch sides?

What I Liked

Was it alright to cheer in the theatre the first time I heard someone say, “And knowing is half the battle?” This truly draws more from the cartoon of the 1980s than the comic books of the 1980s as character development and plot take a back seat to wall-to-wall action. This is just one long fight scene. And Snake Eyes was done right, so I was happy.

What I Didn’t Like

Formulaic plot, too much shaky-cam in the fights, generic music score, and I still don’t understand why the Joes need power armor.

Final Assessment

Waves of nostalgia helped me overlook most of the flaws. A good time, a solid action adventure, and not much else.

3 Nibs

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