For those who have the patience to read my 5000 page rants, you may have noticed that, in several of these rants, I’ve drawn allusions to a young woman in my class whom I have a crush on. Apparently, this has become quite the hot topic of gossip in my class as to who my secret crush is. After all, I am the quiet, creepy kid. I’m sure that all the girls in my class, as they say their prayers every night, throw in the line, “And dear God, please, tell me I’m not Mark’s secret crush!” Anyway, it’s time for the rumour and innuendo to end. I told my class three weeks ago that I’d announce who my secret crush is right here, in this very issue, and this very article.
But first, I’d like to take a minute to talk about math.